Check this out. Now.

Put on some headphones and click on this.

http://media.putfile.com/virtual-barbershop

Neck Snaps

There recently has been public outcry surrounding Geva Comedy Improv's performances, claiming that perhaps we snap each others necks too often. Isn't there another creative way to kill someone on stage quickly when they say things that make no sense?

I think not. Neck-snapping is hilarious. It's quick and painless. Our only form of capital punishment should be neck snaps. It would save hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars every year! People of Rochester, please consider neck-snapping when performing one of your signature acts of street violence. Save me the trouble of going to the hospital and dying painfully, but rather rid my body of all life instantly by simply snapping my neck. It is the right thing to do.

Still not convinced that a neck snap is the best way to do away with someone? Please enjoy Steven Seagal's Letterbox 2000 and then see how you feel.



And quit your whining.

Shoelace Express Dominates Nextstage

In a contest that can only be described as heated, the Shoelace Express steamrolled the Roc-City Rackateers last night with a score of 19-15. Thanks to a stage invasion by the cast of Cabaret, they left the first half of the show with a healthy lead.


The second half of the show started with a more focused effort from the Roc-City Rackateers which culminated with a heart-warming birthday gift to 24 year old Caroline in the form of a Mocha Nipple Jam. The Shoelace Express lashed back with an epic Rock Opera chronicling the adventures of two nuns on a holy crusade to retrieve the banana of Jesus.



Stay tuned for more hot improv announcements and pictures from the show.

Geva Comedy Improv is back on the Nextstage March 23rd and 24th.

Theatre Sports Notes!

The Pretentious Improv Group struck out into an early lead last night with key first half successes in Columns and Sounds like a song. The Beowolves struggled to find their footing in Three-Way Dub and the Ratings Board.
At the half PIG was in the lead with a score of 9 - 4.

The laughs came easier for the Beowolves in the second half and when the match was called by the Referee the teams were tied with scores of 13 - 13. PIG challenged the Beowolves to a dance contest to Right Said Fred's "I'm too Sexy." The two teams marveled the audience with the majesty of their dancing prowess, and thanks to an entrance worthy of an 80's romantic comedy by Nick DiCola, the Beowolves won in the end.



Don't Miss tonight when the Roc-City Racketeers take on the Shoelace Express!

This Weekend's line-up!

Tonight! The 2008 season of Theatre Sports kicks off at 10:30pm!

This evenings line-up:



VS



See who wins in the Nextstage tonight, and tomorrow its...




VS



Choose your favorite team and come root for them!

BE THERE.

Geva Theatre Center Nextstage
Jan. 25th and 25th 2008, 10:30pm
Theatre Sports Kick - Off
$7 (cheap)

SUPER TERRIFIC JAPANESE PIZZA TIME

Super Terrific Japanese Pizza Time Dancing vegetables, crying pizza slices. You guessed it! It`s another wacky Japanese commercial!

NEW TEST RESULTS REVEAL: UNABLE TO TAKE THE PRESSURE

By T.R.
GCI Watchman

Like many people across the World who are concerned with matters of timeliness, I wear a timepiece. Shortly before the first of the year, my watch battery mysteriously died, making me something which I had hoped would not occur for many years yet to come; timeless. When such events occur, I am apt to take certain actions in order to rectify the problem and did so in this circumstance as well. After a grueling exchange with an attendant at the jewelry counter of an unnamed chronographer, I was directed to the Dakota Watch Company kiosk at the mall. The technician behind the counter was very knowledgeable and was able to switch out my watch battery quite efficiently, but then became very concerned when she realized:

“Oh…I never quoted you a price for the battery, did I?”

This confused me, as I have never been in a situation where I felt I needed to get multiple quotes on a watch battery, and assured the young lady that whatever the charge was I would be more than happy to pay it. She appeared relieved, which only further confused me into thinking I should have turned this simple errand into more of an elaborate inconvenience as I traversed the greater Rochester area for the lowest priced watch battery I could find. I quickly dismissed this idea on the grounds of complete absurdity and watched (no pun intended) as the technician placed my watch into some kind of an electro-mechanical device (see picture above) which I assumed to be some kind of automatic watch cleaning machine…it turns out, I was wrong and would soon be told some shocking news.

With all the sincerity and gravitas of an emergency room physician who has the unfortunate task of informing family members of their loved one’s prognosis, the watch technician looked compassionately at me from behind the gleaming glass of the display case and spoke:

“I just put your watch through a pressure test to gauge the integrity of its water resistance and it…FAILED. Your watch is rated for 165 feet…I strongly recommend that you DO NOT go any further than 135 feet underwater.”




I was dumbfounded. This is not a diving watch, nor do I engage in SCUBA activities, but if I did, and if you are familiar with the watch that I typically wear, you would share the same sentiment that no one in their right mind would wear this watch outside of a strictly urban setting, let alone submerge it hundreds of feet below sea level. At this point, I deliberately shut my brain off and allowed myself to get dizzy as she proceeded to give me an in depth seminar on the water resistant elements of horology. After several minutes of technical jargon, discussion of dual o-rings around the crown and bezel and the prospect of preventative maintenance and the replacement of faulty parts, I smiled charmingly, handed over my debit card and replied:

“Thank you for the information, but to be honest with you, If I happen to be 165 feet underwater, the internal structural integrity of my watch will be the least of my concerns. In fact, at that point, I don’t think owning a watch will be necessary at all, unless I wanted to accurately account for the remaining seconds of my life as I tried to remember the bizarre and unlikely events that transpired which led me to be 165 feet underwater.”

In a world already wrought with innumerable stressors, I am now forced to add yet another line item to my long list of things I need to worry about – are the o-rings on my chronograph a mere 30 feet from structural failure? Ironically, I am forced to gaze upon the very device in question and live everyday in uncertainty – for only time will tell. Well, that and a hell of a lot of water...

Aggressive New Blogging Strategies stalls when Paul Nellis is out of town

Good thing I'm back bitches! Happy Monday to anyone reading this at work. Yes, it's true, I was out of town for a few days and neglected the blog-postings. For those of you with a daily thirst for all things GCI, I must apologize. Please, enjoy this picture of John Zaffino at his birthday party last night.
Yes - that IS a ceramic Samurai drink holder John is drinking from. How delightfully tacky! The 27th birthday celebration was one to remember - it had all the classic elements: the Japanese Hibachi show, the drinking of the drinks, the going to the bars, and the changing of the tire. Ah, memories.

3 Movies

Hey. John here. I noticed something while cleaning this weekend. I found three movies in my collection that could be used to make people rebel against society. Yeah, I totally did! The movies would all have to be watched back to back marathon style to really work, but once the credits started rollin' on that last flick you'd have a full fledged rebel on your hands. I want to see what you guys think about this list, so without further adeu, here's the movie marathon of nihilism.

1.) Office Space - Start things off light: "Boy, the office sure stinks; don't ya hate traffic?; bosses can be jerks"; etc.. This movie reminds people of what a bummer the day to day grind can be. An important step in removing the shackles of society, before the next step: taking it a step further!

2.) Cool Hand Luke - By far the most depressing entry in the movie marathon of nihilism, the movie centers on Luke. Luke is just about the coolest guy you could imagine, getting himself sent to a labor prison cause there was nothin' better to do. Luke cools it up for a while and attempts to escape a few times *Spoiler Alert* but the prison breaks him. watchin the last couple scenes really angries up the blood.

3.) Fight Club - Ok, anyone with a Y chromosome thought "Dude we should totally start a fight club!" when first watching this movie. They did a great job of making the deterioration of society look not only like a blast, but a pretty good idea (who needs vaccines and automobiles, we know how to fight!). After seeing the previous two movies, destroying credit unions will seem like a neccesity.

****Warning: Any persons watching these three movies in succession will quit thier job and try to fight you. Please use with extreme caution.

So there's the list, and required discliamer. Anybody have any additions or subtitutions they think would up the ante on turning people against their keepers?

Check out our amazing new homepage

In case you just check our blog, you should also check out the stunning graphic beauty that is our new home page.

www.gevacomedyimprov.org

I also like some of the new headshots. Check these out:

Chris, why are you biting your lip like that? Are you hot with anticipation for the new website?




Swithun your hair is all standing up on end. And just what is that in your mouth? A stirring straw? Why would you be chewing on a stirring straw?





Apparently when someone tells Ted to smile he looks like he's going to cry. And with that beard it looks like the Brawny man is going to cry. This is too sad. And too creepy.





My picture is by far the worst. You can't see my eyes and the expression I'm making indicates that I'm experiencing some sort of frustration. It's almost inappropriate. This picture has ruined any chance I have with any woman who ever sees it. I hope it's not in the program.

Another Lazy Saturday

And here I am, degree in creative writing, and nothing to freaking say. Great shame I have brought upon my family. All of my skills have withered and died. Is this the end of the new year's resolution to blog more??

FEAR NOT! Did you know that in China they have the same word for crisis as they do for opportunity? I've heard everyone say that before, so perhaps if I force myself to sit down and blog everyday my head will soon be exploding with ideas for blog postings so funny that you'll be checking back everyday for my new material. Probably not, but possibly.

Still, trying to find something funny to write about is tough and everyone knows writer's block isn't funny - it's just boring. Allow me to recall what I've been up to since I quit my job. Absolutely nothing. Crap I'm screwed need to pull the cord on this one... ah... uh... oh I know! Hilarious pictures from our show Thanksgiving weekend!

I don't know what happened but I bet it sure was funny when Beki gave Nick a ride in that car!

In classic Mookie fashion, he tries not to fall down!!
Brian and Ted are the BEST of friends! One more...
Our most colorful selection yet... looks like Liam can handle himself but Chris is laughing and Paul Nellis is about to lose it. Just too much fun. Oh we can't leave out Swithun, here he is...
Perhaps a little bit on his side - but rest quietly - that's Swithun all right, sagacious as always.

*All photos by the dear Kevin Leas.

Another Hilarious Clip!

Satan in the bushes?

Exciting new picture!!

Now those are some pretty faces. Tim Goodwin just sent this in! Everyone got together for a cast photo, but apparently no one told Brian or JZ. So now what seems to have happened is that Tim Goodwin pasted in pictures of them from different parts of the night.

So while everyone else looks like they just did a show, Brian looks like he's about to ask me to marry him. JZ looks like some sort of homicidal manic who kills people with golf clubs. Also Adam Litz, up from PA for the night, looks like Lex Luthor. Nick kind of looks like the bad guy Jason Lee did the voice for in The Incredibles.

Pictures are fun! If you have pictures from our show, send them in! We love pictures!

Thanks, Tim Goodwin, you really saved us this time. Oh and congratulations on your new year's eve 'victory.'

Geva Comedy Improv Makes New Year's Resolution to Blog More in 2008

All,

Happy New Years! Happy 2008!

Anyway, thanks to anyone who came out last night and rang in the New Years with us in true GCI style! A grand time was had by all! By the end of the night (which was sometime around sunrise) Geva Comedy Improv, not unlike many of you out there in Internet-land, made a New Year's Resolution for 2008. We solemnly promise to do out best to provide more hilarious blog material in 2008. We at GCI are painfully aware in the disappointing decline in blog postings on what was once voted the best locally-based blog by Rochester's City Newspaper.

We would like to start 2008 off right with this amusing picture taken sometime around 5am.
Enjoy and have a great year!